The Youth Event Nobody Has Ever Seen

I got the idea for this post from Tim Schmoyer's "63 Youth Ministry Issues I Hope You Cover". This weekend, we are doing an event that is probably the most unique event that I've done since I've been in youth ministry over ten years.

We have an annual campout retreat that we do every fall that has evolved into a family event. We encourage our youth to bring their parents. This is a great opportunity for us to have a youth event without cutting into the much-needed family time that many families desperately need. It also gives families an opportunity to study the Bible together as a family. Now, that's not where this event is unique.

This year, we will be doing something a bit different at our family campout. You see, in our area, there was famous Comanche Indian raid that occurred in 1836 during the Texas Revolution (Texas was fighting for its independence from Mexico). The raid occurred just about 2 miles from the state park where we will be camping. There is also a cemetery that is walking distance from our campground where some of the people who were involved in that incident are buried. In the incident, a 9-year old girl named Cynthia Ann Parker was captured and eventually married a Comanche chief. Her son Quanah Parker was the last great Comanche chief and was influential in teaching the Comanche to adopt the white way of life and also became a wealthy statesman, friend of several US Presidents, and even a minister of the gospel (of sorts-see link above).

So, Friday night, of the campout, we are going to go on a hike through the woods (by lantern) and arrive at the cemetery. One of our parents will be in period costume dressed as James Parker whose neice was captured in the Indian raid and who organized many searches for a number of years until she was recovered more than 20 years later. This "ghost story" will introduce the kids to a piece of our local history. Then we will examine the story from different angles and look at the biblical themes in it. The biblical aspects of the story and the biblical stories that parallel this one will be discussion fodder for our Bible studies.

I know most of us would rather teach the Bible than anything, which is good. But I think we often sell our students short by not teaching them the history of their communities. While the Bible has a lot of great role models and examples of character, often times there are people in their communities whom God has used in similar ways.

So what are the youth events you've done that you could call unique?

Do you think an event of this nature is selling the kids short on good biblical teaching?

Top 10 Ways to Kill a Weekend Youth Retreat

We just finished up our annual fall campout/retreat. This has become an annual event for us. While very little went quite as planned, it was still an amazing weekend. I started to evaluate what made this weekend a success and came up with ten things we didn't do to make this trip successful. So, here are ten things youth workers do to ruin a weekend retreat.

1. Micro-plan every second. Part of what makes a retreat work is there is downtime. The idea of the word retreat is that we are retreating from our normal lives. If our retreat weekend is busier than our normal life, we will create more stress and fatigue rather than giving an escape from them. Have a schedule, but make it loose and allow room for flexibility.

2. Allow/encourage technology. I butted heads with several of my students this weekend who were texting back and forth as well as playing video games. One student even insisted that her parents would be upset if she made herself "inaccessible" and turned her phone off. But what is the point of getting away if we stay connected to the real world? I'm not saying everything in the world is bad, but we limit our availability to the Holy Spirit by keeping one foot back home.

3. Make it all about fun. Any retreat experience has to have a recreational aspect to it. We go camping for ours. However, if fun is the only aspect, students aren't challenged and probably won't learn anything. Make sure fun has a point.

4. Don't offer any new experiences. We have one place we have gone the last 4 years for our fall retreat. However, each year has had a different theme and different activities. Also, there has been a different focus each year. This year we looked at the history of the area we were in and a famous Indian raid that happened in 1836. We tied the story of the pioneers to our own spiritual journey of being strangers in a foreign land.

5. Go to a big city with lots of attractions/distractions. This probably goes without saying, but I wanted to throw it in. I don't know if people in small towns ever go to big cities for retreats, but it just seems counterproductive. Even in a town of 18,000 people, there are a ton of distractions. And the majority of our students live in the country in homes surrounded by woods. Yet they spend the majority of their time playing video games and talking on Facebook. Giving them more distractions from an urban environment squelches the purpose of the retreat.

6. Provide luxury accomodations. Part of a retreat is helping students realize how good they have it. Doing your retreat in a 4-star hotel isn't doing them any favors. The gospel is something that grows out of simplicity and hardship rather than the plush and lavish things of life.

7. Try to lead the whole thing yourself. I've been with great youth workers and I've been with terrible ones. The latter were probably more because I failed to train them or they insisted it was my job to do everything. i.e. What do you get paid to do? But I've found that on youth events where I tried to do everything myself, I was stressed out the whole time and couldn't really enjoy the experience. Have someone to plan your meals. Have someone plan some recreational time. Have someone plan your Bible study times. Don't use your free time preparing for your next session. Use that time to bond with your kids and your youth workers.

8. Do it in a familiar setting. We have a fantastic camp/retreat center less than 10 miles from our church. Our kids go to our district summer camp there for one week every year. I've tried to schedule other events out there and they are always poorly attended. Many of our students literally live closer to the camp center than they do to our church. There is no mystique about going out there for a 2-day retreat. Try to plan your retreats in a place that isn't "old hat".

9. Don't give an opportunity for a spiritual response. One thing I try to do when planning every youth event is ask myself "What do I want to accomplish with this event?" So try to focus the activities and studies towards some sort of spiritual response. This year's response was to live with more of a kingdom purpose. Without a spiritual response, it would have been just a campout in the woods.

10. Expect a certain kind of spiritual result. Remember, I'm saying these things will kill your retreat. Don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying that we shouldn't design the events, activities, and Bible studies toward a certain spiritual focus (#9). But when we expect a certain result, we put God in a box by insisting that what we want to accomplish and what he wants to accomplish are one and the same. Maybe you're hoping that one guy will quit making such poor choices or that one girl will finally have the strength to break up with her boyfriend. Maybe there's another student you hope will finally put his faith in Christ? When we expect these things to happen and they don't it kills all the great things that DID happen during the weekend. A weekend is not necessarily a miserable failure because we were hoping for a particular breakthrough in a particular situation and didn't get it..

What have been the things that have destroyed some of the retreats you have been on? What things really make them better?

Youth Ministry: Why I Quit Doing Hot Topic Lessons (mostly)

Youth culture is always changing. Every week or so, there is a new movement, social connection, video game, movie, behavioral trend, or teen cultural issue that makes youth workers like me scratch our heads. Whether it's emos who cut themselves, another teen's obsession with all things vampire from the Twilight movies, or being engrossed in the latest violent video games, there are constantly cultural patterns that demand a response from youth workers. In youth ministry circles, these are known as "hot topics".

I used to be one of those guys who felt the need to address every diabolical trend that came down the pike. And there was no shortage of fodder for lesson material. I might have been in a rut and not sure what I should teach for Wednesday night. Suddenly, I get an email from a leading voice in youth ministry about a cultural trend that was cause for concern. I might contact a few students to ask them if they'd heard of this. Then I did some research online about it. Then, of course, I would find a Bible passage that speaks to the issue (not the specific issue, but to the idea behind the issue), and then VOILA! I have a youth lesson.

But in hindsight, here is where I think I was getting it wrong. Youth culture changes so much that I think addressing these little issues is really getting to the symptom rather than the problem. My lessons were knee-jerk reactions to all the terrible evils floating around in youth culture and were attempts to steer my kids away from them, rather than showing them how to learn to navigate these issues themselves. If we mold our ministry around the concept of teaching students to avoid certain issues or telling them what to think or believe about those issues, what happens when they go on in life and are forced to formulate those values for themselves? Are they going to continue to ask, "I wonder what my youth worker would say about this?" Or, are they going to be able to articulate a healthy stance on the subject through a mature, faith-based world view? Another problem is there are so many things that could be seen as worthy of being addressed--TV shows, movies, video games, new things kids are doing at parties, things students are doing on social media, cell phones, new drugs, bullying... Where does the list end?

So in recent years, my approach has been to teach Scripture as it relates to modern culture. In this sense, I feel, I am keeping the horse in front of the cart. For example, we've had an issue in recent months with boys and girls struggling in their interaction with one another. While teenage interaction is usually awkward and unrefined to say the least, there are things that are appropriate and things that are not. Rather than doing a lesson on how students should interact with one another, I have been doing a series on the book of Ruth. Through studying Ruth, we get to learn about the Israelite culture and what social nuances were expected of the characters. We also learn how the characters worked within those social confines to communicate admiration for one another in a socially appropriate manner. Another thing the story teaches is how Boaz was attracted to Ruth because of her commitment to Naomi and to the God of Israel.

So in teaching Scripture, as opposed to teaching cultural issues, the intent is that we are laying a foundation that will be relevant not just to the areas of immediate concern, but that will have meaning throughout the students' lives as they make their journey into adulthood and beyond. To put it plainly, I prefer to teach Scripture in light of youth culture as opposed to teaching youth culture in light of Scripture. A good metaphor would be one of riding in the front seat with the students driving the car rather than driving the students to the desired destination. Through the Bible, we are giving instruction, but ultimately it is the students making the decisions. I do find myself doing topical lessons on occasion, but usually to break things up (this statement posted after Adam McClane's comment) a bit. Topical lessons do have their place in ministry. I just don't think they should be the main focus.

So what are your thoughts? Have you ever found yourself formulating a ministry around knee-jerk teaching? When and how often do you do "hot topic" lessons?

Why Evangelism and Discipleship are Inseparable

I am currently serving in the United Methodist Church and have found that in the last four years philosophy of ministry has changed to some extent. Having come from an evangelical background to a mainline denomination, I have notices some stark differences between the way we approach different things, particularly evangelism.

What I've noticed in attending ecumenical events since I've begun working in a mainline church is that any time an event is planned where there may be non-believers in attendance, there must be a concerted effort to present them with the message of the gospel (specifically the idea that Christ's death and resurrection demands a response from us) hopefully causing them to repent of their sins and give their lives to Christ, putting their faith in him as their Lord and Savior. This is not a bad thing at all, so don't think I'm being critical of it. But there are a few problems with making anything specifically evangelistic.

1. With all the effort put into the presentation of the message, there must be an equally concerted effort on follow-up with the new believers. Unfortunately, this is rarely ever done effectively. Young believers are given a commitment card where they are asked to put their church home if they have one. And are otherwise left to follow Christ on their own until a pastor, youth worker, or another believer comes alongside them to get them plugged into the church. This should be a seamless transition, but in over ten years of ministry, I don't think I've ever seen it work well. You can also read a great post by my friend Tim Schmoyer about his struggles with outreach events.

2. New believers go to these outreach-focused events and think everything else in the church or ministry is just like that. Then when they show up to a normal Wednesday night youth meeting without the great band, the lights, and the videos, they are very disappointed. Then they feel like they've been a victim of a bait and switch coupon circular where they were lured into a store for a great buy on a great product only to find they only had two in stock which sold out the first day of the sale.

3. Edification of existing believers must be sacrificed to meet the needs of those who are curious about faith. I have heard some preachers say that every message preached ought to point to the gospel. While I agree with that, I think it gets off track when we put "the gospel" in a box. Making every message point to the fact that Christ died for our sins and we should put our faith in him to be saved will eventually sound like a broken record. While that is the primary tenet of the Christian faith, the fact is the "good news" is so much more than that. So a message can be directed at mature believers and still point to the good news of Christ.

4. Events that are focused primarily on bringing the lost to Christ can be designed to be emotionally manipulative and leave little room for the Holy Spirit. I've been to events where the gospel is presented in some dramatic fashion using vague terminology and a lack of specific criteria where every person in the room could have easily been made to feel that their status with the Almighty was lacking and in need of repair. Maybe some strong guys broke some stuff. Maybe some fantastic athletes shared the message that you can do "all things through Christ." Maybe a great story teller told the most dramatic, captivating rendition of a Bible passage. Maybe there was a band playing the same three chords over and over for 30 minutes lulling the audience into a trance and people start going down front just so they can go home soon. Maybe every head was bowed and every eye was closed and the person who had been made to feel guilty lifted their head, then later walked down front, talked with a stranger, filled out a card, and went home feeling just like she did when she arrived.

5. We equate lots of people coming down front with lots of conversions and spiritual change. I think there is a difference between effective evangelism and giving a good sales pitch. Unfortunately, I've found myself trying to "help God out" by making a dramatic sales pitch for the gospel. And some people do it very well, and the aisles are flooded with teary-eyed spiritual derelicts. But then after all the cards have been filled out and everyone is ready for the next day of work or school, has anything truly changed?

So what is the answer? Am I saying we should not be evangelistic? Absolutely not. But I am saying that we should not separate evangelism from discipleship. When I look back at Acts 2 and read where the believers devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching, to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread, and to prayer, I notice that the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved. While we don't know what specific teachings they were studying, I have a feeling that if the only tenet they studied was the idea of saving faith through belief in Christ's resurrection, their congregation would not have lasted very long. And remember, this was at a time in history when literally the whole world had not heard the message of Christ. If there was ever a time to be specifically evangelistic, it was then. But they devoted themselves to the entirety of the apostles' teaching.

Another hint is found in the writings of Paul. He refers to mature and immature believers and those who are young in the faith. He also refers to those who are non-believers. He encourages Timothy to do the work of an evangelist. He writes in Ephesians 4:11 that "some are called to be evangelists, while others are called to be pastors and teachers, for the equipment of the saints, for the work of the ministry." While those evangelists have their place, their ministry is ineffective without the pastors and teachers who can nurture those young converts in their faith. Look at the encounter of Philip with the Ethiopian eunuch. There were no showy gimmicks. There was no worship-band-induced trances. There was no preaching of guilt and eternal damnation. Philip simply was obedient to the Lord and met the Ethiopian where he was. He was already seeking. The Holy Spirit was already at work, Philip was just being available.

The message of Christ really speaks for itself. We should be more concerned with introducing people to it and less concerned with embellishing it to make it appealing. Then, when true conversion occurs, we know it's the work of the Holy Spirit and not the work of our indulgence.

Grounding Your Kids From Church

I recently had a discussion with a parent who informed me their student would not be attending youth group for a while until (s)he learned the merits of good decision making. This caused me to ponder a certain phenomenon I have yet to figure out. This weekend as I was on the tractor baling hay, my mind began to think about this idea at length. Here are some things I concluded.

First of all, from a ministry standpoint, grounding a student from church because the student has made bad choices, goes against all logic. In high school I struggled through algebra. When I failed an algebra test, my mom did not forbid me from doing more math homework. It was quite the opposite. My education-minded mother brought me to school early so I could spend time with my teacher learning what I had not yet mastered. So why would a parent whose student is not making good decisions deprive that student from an institution that I believe is set up to help them make good decisions? Here are three possible reasons.

1. Parents do not perceive church youth programs to be relevant, life-changing institutions that truly have a positive impact on their son or daughter's moral development. As youth workers, we know why we got into youth ministry, and it wasn't for the astronomical salary and benefits. It was to see students lives changed as they become molded into the spirit of Christ. However, from the outside looking in, it may be very accurate to say that parents perceive our youth programs as another social function where kids play "chubby bunnies" and have concerts and lock-ins, but do little to shape the spiritual lives of teens.

2. Church youth programs are not relevant, life-changing institutions that truly have a positive impact on their son or daughter's moral development. While some people who have not spent any time in a youth program may not have a clue what goes on, the fact remains that some of our youth ministries are not doing the work God has called us to do. Many of us as youth workers have bought into the "amusement park tour guide" mentality that it is our job just to make sure the kids are too busy to get into "sex, drugs, and rock 'n roll". If our programs are not doing anything to mold the spiritual lives of our teens, maybe our parents are justified in grounding their kids from church.

3. Church members in general do not perceive the church to be agents of divine change in the world. If a parent does not perceive the youth group to be an important part of a student's spiritual and moral growth, it may be because the church is not an important part of the parent's spiritual and moral growth. This will depend on the individual and the church. But I would dare say that for many church members (including those with teenage youth), the church is another social network, a place to make business contacts, or it serves another menial role other than being an agent of change in the world.

So what would you add to this list? Do your parents ground kids from church? If so, why do you think that is? I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Commitment and the BIG MO in Youth Ministry

Summer is winding down and our youth group is getting ready to kick off our Sunday small group program in the fall. This program is not a new one, but we have taken the summer off since the majority of our students scattered like cockroaches when school let out--band camp, football camp, family vacation, going to stay with grandma for a week, etc. And so now we want to start strong and build consistency and momentum going into the school year.

I've been a player and fan of sports my entire life. The concept of momentum (the Big "Mo") is one that is debated among people in the sports world. Some will say that key plays during the course of a game have no effect on that team's ability to make more critical plays. Others, like me, though, believe that one key play can be a turning point. One key play can be what causes a team to realize they can actually score on the next possession, close the lead, and/or pull off the upset. Momentum is what makes it easier to push a rolling car than it is to push a car that is setting still (and is hopefully in neutral with nobody's foot on the brake!). So how do we get a new program rolling from a dead standstill? The answer is simple. Commitment.

I thought about how important it is that parents and students who participate in our program be committed from the beginning. For the first 4-6 weeks, we need to have everyone there. This is not the time for one last trip to the lake or that family vacation. (These things aren't bad, but they are detrimental to the re-establishment of any ministry program). I also examined the climate of the program, with and without the commitment of the students.

No Commitment:

Worship feels small, worshipers are timid

Adult volunteers are frustrated (waste of their time)

"Where is everybody?"

Discussion groups have little to no discussion

"Who else is coming?"

Boring

With Commitment:

More friends=more fun

Group discounts

Inviting visitors

Fun with friends

Discussion groups have more discussion

More relationships built

Worship is exciting

Students don't have to wait for the next big event to enjoy youth group

"I can't wait for Sunday/Wednesday night"

Synergy--The whole is greater than the sum of the parts

We live in a culture that doesn't honor commitment. With celebrities being known for being flakes and professional athletes whining over getting $4.5 million instead of $5 million, it's no wonder that commitment is not a mainstay of our students' lives. Some kids sign up for a sport or activity and decide halfway through the season they don't want to do it, parents often let them drop out. Or the kids join an activity only to have their coach or volunteer bail out because he or she doesn't have time. But I think commitment is important to God and should be to us.

In Exodus 16 the Israelites have been in the desert for several weeks and are running out of food. They miss the "pots of meat" and abundant food they had in the oppressive land of Egypt. So God provides manna (bread) from heaven that he requires them to gather daily. The crafty Israelites soon try to outsmart God and decide they will gather a surplus so they don't have to gather it daily. The Bible says that it became rotten and full of maggots. God wanted their daily dependence on him, and their daily commitment to trusting him.

Commitment in any ministry program can be a catch 22. You need active kids to get them committed and you need commitment to have active kids. So let's start this school year off as youth workers, parents, and students with expectations of being committed to our youth ministry this school year.

Youth Ministry Rant-Ministers or Salespersons?

Do you ever feel like more of a salesperson and less like someone in youth ministry? If you're like me, you went into ministry to see lives changed for the better; to see students develop a passion for God, to see people change the world because God had changed them. But now it doesn't look anything like that. It's time for the next big event that will change the lives of your students and rather than signing them up at warp speed, you find yourself making phone calls and emails confirming that they are coming and that they have their money and forms filled out.

I've spent nine of the last eleven years doing full time youth ministry at two different churches. In the middle, though, I had a two-year stint as an insurance salesman...uh, I mean...agent. While the pay was good and showed promise of even better pay, this was one of the most difficult jobs of my life. Life insurance was our company's bread and butter. And every agent in the company understood the value of life insurance. The problem was convincing our clients that they needed life insurance and helping them realize that need so they would by it. So once you had a meeting with the client, you set up a follow-up meeting, then discuss all the reasons they need it and encourage them to buy it. Four years after leaving that job, I feel like I'm doing the same thing all over again...this time in ministry.

While it may not be true, it certainly feels like I'm trying to convince students why they need to be a part of our program. I'm trying to convince parents why they need to be active in our program. It's phone calls and emails. It's not about relationships, but about advertising. We are "selling" a deeper relationship with God at little or no cost and yet, we still have to persuade people as to why this is better than any of the dozens of other activities they can be involved in.

Maybe it's because we've become a society of consumers. Maybe it's because band camp, soccer camp, and church camp, all come with a price tag. I've read so many posts about the perils of program-based youth ministry. And yes, the program should not be our end goal. But we have to have structure and consistency to build relationships. We need events to enrich faith and provide opportunities for teaching. So why do I feel like my job as a youth minister is to peddle the youth program and its activities? I'm not sure but it's frustrating. If you have any answers, I covet your thoughts.

Is Youth Ministry Going Viral? What Does that Look Like?

I've been doing a lot of reading recently. One book I just finished is Youth Ministry 3.0 by Youth Specialties president Mark Ostreicher. Mark breaks down two previous eras in the way youth ministry was done in the past, citing some absurd examples of things that (unfortunately) happened in the course of real youth ministry. Some of you older youth guys like me remember the initiation ceremonies and the mild hazing (I remember being hung on a bunk bed by the back of my underwear as pre-teen at church camp and getting my first swirly as a 6th grader at youth camp) that went along with being the new kid in the youth group--stuff that we now know has the potential to scar kids for life (I went into youth ministry--what does that tell you?). Then he explores "Youth Ministry 2.0" where we've moved into the more civil and modern program-driven model. When he gets to the section about 3.0, he points out some cultural trends in youth ministry but doesn't really lay out what this new paradigm looks like. Another thing is that technology is changing so fast I don't think we really know what tech devices and programs are here to stay with teens because it's all coming at us so fast. I've been reading blogs and other books trying to figure out where youth ministry as a whole is headed. It seems it's going "viral." If you've ever clicked the "Retweet this" button at the bottom of a post, you've helped to make it viral (feel free to retweet this, by the way). By "viral" I mean that the information in the church bulletin is not the main form of communication. Technology has afforded us opportunities to arrange informal, spontaneous meetings with the "send" of a text message. So ministries can be "formal about being informal". And these meetings are often seen as more intimate and genuine because they were not promoted in the church bulletin, and did not have an agenda predicated by a postcard the week before.

Yesterday I read another blog post about how one youth worker doesn't plan for the summer. If there's anything I've learned from reading books and going to conferences, the last thing we should do is try to copycat what is working in another ministry. That is not my intent. But I do want to find ways to make elements of this approach work in my ministry. I've always wanted to be the guy the kids drop in on in the office and hang out, or they just come over to my house. But our church has a pretty rigid sexual ethics policy which discourages less formal encounters in ministry. Also, the majority of the kids who attend our downtown church live on the outskirts of town, some even 10+ miles away. But the more I read posts like this, the more I wonder if this is the new paradigm for youth ministry? Ministry that's not done on a Wednesday night with a band and a Power Point, but done down the street at the coffee shop sitting around a Bible and a mocha latte.

So for those of you who are reading this, I covet your feedback. Is your youth ministry "going viral." Have you gotten away from putting scheduled events in the church bulletin and gone to impromptu meetings prompted by a text message? If you've been able to do this, what obstacles have you encountered or overcome? How has this approach given your students a sense of being an insider to something more meaningful than just being part of a youth group?

Are We "Bachelor-izing" Our Youth Groups?

One of the shows my wife likes to watch is The Bachelor (or Bachelorette, depending on the season). You've probably seen at least parts of the show which is part dating show and part social experiments which puts a lucky single person with 25 "contestants" of the opposite sex who jockey for time with the single, all the while pulling out all the stops to rise above the rest of the pack. Aside from the fact that the bachelor or bachelorette is put in an environment with what most would be considered to be desirable suitors (smart, sexy, funny....etc.), is that the shows endless budget puts the contestants in some of the most romantic settings imaginable-swimming near an active volcano, helicopter rides, and a private concert from Chicago just to name a few. And after all of the gorgeous contestants, the exotic locations, the limousines, the champagne, and 5-star accommodations, 15 of the show's 18 final relationships crashed and burned.

While there are a number of factors at play, I think one main reason for this is because this "reality" TV show is not based in reality. Who dates 25 women at the same time? Who gets a private concert from Chicago on a first date? Who goes on group dates with 7 women at the same time? In the real world this scenario would go over as my former pastor said "like a flock of bird dogs." This would be enough to find the average guy broke and lonely with a big red hand print on the side of his face! So why do we do this with our youth programs?

No, I'm not talking about fixing up couples in our youth groups. I'm talking about creating an alternate reality for our students. While only 17% of Bachelor couples stay together, our numbers are not much better for students who hang on to their faith after high school-only about 35% according to one Barna study. Sure, when a student enters college, there is more time, less discipline, and mom and dad aren't breathing down the kid's neck watching his every move. But there are also new ideas, different worldviews, and concepts that challenge what the student was taught at home, at school, and at church. I think sometimes we, like the Bachelor TV show, play into this by creating a false reality with our youth programs. We do the best trips, attend the best camps, have the best outside speakers and worship leaders, and go to the farthest places for missions so our kids can be discipled and strengthened in their faith. Then when they leave the youth group and there are no more expensive camps with famous speakers and going on a $2000 mission trip has been replaced with trying to live on a student loan or a Pell Grant, the student doesn't know how to live out his faith in the real world. His social network of Christian students has been disbanded and he is on his own in reality, not the reality TV show he once knew. No more limousines, hot tubs, and steak and lobster. This is the real world and he will have to learn to use his faith to function in it or he will abandon his faith.

So what can we do to keep from "Bachelor-izing" our youth groups?

1. Make sure we don't do events just for the sake of doing events. Much talk has been made in recent years about moving away from program-based ministry. Programs are essential in youth ministry, but we must examine our programs and evaluate why we are doing them.
2. Remember that spiritual impact is not directly proportional to cost. "You get what you pay for" may be an appropriate credo when shopping at Wal-Mart, but is not a good blanket statement for ministry. Going to the biggest camp or hiring the most expensive speakers and going on the coolest retreats or missions trips doesn't mean our kids will automatically be mature disciples.
3. Teach our kids to engage the world around them. Too many youth workers, I feel, work really hard at sheltering their students from the harsh realities of things like network television, R-rated movies, rock music and other taboo subjects. While I don't advocate using too much of the world as fodder for teaching, we are not doing students any favors to refuse to acknowledge that certain things exist outside the walls of the church (and try to isolate them from it rather than teaching how to deal with it).
4. Move towards individual discipleship as much as corporate discipleship. Hopefully your kids are all on a journey together, but they are also all on their individual journeys as well. Much of our youth ministry programs focus on relationships, fellowship, and the collective experience. But we should not do that to the detriment of individual, personal discipleship. Teaching students to follow God on their own is an invaluable tool as they leave the nest of the youth group and enter a college or young adult ministry.

What things would you add to this list?

Building Unity Between Teenaged Christians from Different Churches

Last week at youth group, we talked about the Olympics and how amazing it is that so many countries (83 in this one) come together across barriers of geography, culture, and language to join in the spirit of friendly competition. If all of the Olympic athletes were from the same country, competing in the same sport, this would be no different than any other competition. But what makes the Olympics so great is the diversity. Different flags, different languages, different stories, different experiences. Without this diversity, the beauty of the games is gone.

We talked about how we should celebrate diversity within the body of Christ. Though we may worship differently from other Christians or have different doctrines about baptism or ordination of ministers, we should still embrace this diversity. The apostle Paul discusses this in Ephesians 4:2-6 where he says that we should "make every effort to keep the unity of the spirit." But what seems to happen with teenagers often is rather than embrace their brothers and sisters of different denominations, they argue with each other about which ones are "truly saved" or which ones have the more biblical view of baptism.

I grew up in, was ordained in, and went to seminary in a denomination that is very proud of its doctrine. I learned pretty early on why we believed the way we did and why our belief was "right" or "better than" what some of the other churches taught. But now, I'm in a different denomination. And as we discussed the issue in youth group of embracing Christian brothers and sisters from other Christian denominations, some of my kids were telling me that people from my old church system were the ones at school who were very critical of them because they didn't believe the exact same things they did.

It just seems to me like there are bigger issues to tackle and bigger battles to win rather than who has the correct mode of baptism or of the Lord's Supper. What if Christians were able to truly put their differences aside and come together for a common purpose instead of arguing over which ones were going to heaven? What if we as youth workers made it our goal to teach students to love other Christians regardless of the name on the sign at their church? I think it could be as monumental and beautiful as the Olympics rather than looking like a little league game with a bunch of hot-tempered parents.

So how do we do this?

1. Focus more on the big picture of Christianity than the details of doctrine. Is doctrine important? Yes. But should it be so important that it divides rather than unites the body of Christ? Absolutely not.

2. Spend time with youth workers from other denominations. You'll soon find that while their may be differences in the details of how your churches function, you have a lot more similarities than differences. Then you can help each other become the youth workers God has called you to be. Our youth worker network meets once a month. Every other month we discuss events, joint activities, and vision for our combined ministries. Then on the months in between, we just hang out and fellowship. National Network of Youth Ministries has a website and many tools for you to find a network in your area or start one up.

3. Provide opportunities for students in your area to worship together, learn together, and fellowship together. In our town, we have a city-wide Disciple Now in the spring and in the fall we have a city-wide See You At The Pole rally. We use an interdenominational curriculum for the D-Now from Student Life.

What things do you do to build unity among students from different churches?

Five Keys to Leading Effective Small Groups

Small groups can be an intimidating endeavor for a new youth worker (usually a volunteer) who's never sat in a circle with five or ten teenagers. It can be awkward and can feel like there is a lot of pressure to change the lives of each student in the short meeting time. It can be even more intimidating when you hand them a 150 page book on how to lead effective small groups. So, this is a crash course in leading small groups that I developed for the small group leaders at our church. We have a lesson (app. 20 mins) where everyone in the group is together and I teach them. Then they break into small groups and discuss questions about the lesson. But regardless of what type of format you use for small groups this would work for any question and answer time. Maybe this will help you and your small group leaders in their ministries.

1. Try to use open-ended questions that foster discussion. Avoid “yes” or “no” questions. If a yes/no question is unavoidable, ask the question “why” they answered that way. Our goal is not as much to tell them what to think, but to allow them to openly come to a conclusion and discuss it with the group.
2. Don’t be afraid of silence. In a small group of teenage boys or girls there will be awkward silence. Do not be afraid of it. Many times if a question goes unanswered, the leader will try to answer it for the group and the group remains stagnant. Feel free to give students a chance to think about their answers, even when it gets a little awkward.
3. Do not feel like you have to discuss every question. If question 1 or 2 spurs lots of discussion feel free to let them wrestle with it and talk. Our goal is to foster spiritual discussions, not to get through every question on the list.
4. Try to keep the students on task. While you don’t have to get through all the questions, your goal is to see that the students are interacting with one another about spiritual things. So if the discussion is still related to the topic or is somewhat spiritual, let them go with it. Now, when talk turns to that incident that happened in the hall between 5^th and 6^th period or what girl is interested in what boy, then it’s time to bring it back on track.
5. Feel free to ask your own questions. The questions in the lesson book or on your handout were created by someone creating the lesson. They are certainly not the complete authority on what things in these passages we should be discussing. So if something comes up and you want to ask a question that is not in the book or on the list, fire away!

Build Relationships by Diagraming Your Youth Program

Many youth workers serve small communities that may have only one school or school district in the immediate area. But if you live in a larger metropolitan area or in a small to mid-sized town with smaller rural schools in the area, chances are you have students who attend your church or youth group from different schools. Not only is this a nightmare for planning events (thank goodness our area schools have taken strides to keep everyone on the same page for major holidays like Spring Break, Thanksgiving, and Christmas), but it makes building relationships among students extremely challenging. For example, in our town, we have two AAA high schools (one that is quite a bit larger than the other), but in a 15-mile radius from our town, we have four other A and AA schools. Many of these students attend churches or youth groups in town. So if we have eight high school guys who regularly attend, they may be from four or five different schools. So when they get to youth group, they have only one or two friends that they know from school and maybe only 20 to 45 minutes to get to know some of the other kids when we aren't having Bible study or other structured activities. And that's in a best-case scenario when they take the time to actually attempt to get to know the other kids, assuming they are not shy, stuck up, or don't have some kind of social anxiety disorder.

The other day, I tried something new in an effort to better deal with our situation-I diagrammed our youth group. No, I didn't make a Venn diagram with overlapping circles or anything overly complicated. I just listed all the kids we had in our youth group who attend and divided them up by high school boys, high school girls, junior high boys, and junior high girls. Then within those four smaller groups, I color-coded each students name according to the school they attended. Well, in case you're wondering how it turned out, our relatively small group looked like a bowl of Skittles. Here is what this activity taught me.

1. It showed me that cliques are inevitable and are not necessarily a bad thing. When different schools are represented, students who go to the same school have something in common with one another and are part of each others' comfort zone.

2. It showed me where we need to focus on building relationships. In order for our group to be a cohesive unit, students have to spend time with one another outside of our church meetings and events. They need to have time to spend together being teenagers. This can even be done without a Bible study or any "spiritual" agenda (although spending time in fellowship with one another certainly is). They need to go eat together. They need to sleep over at each others houses and fall asleep at 3AM with an X-Box controller in their hands and their head in a half-eaten bowl of popcorn.

3. It showed me how radically different we need to approach our program. Many youth groups see the overall program from 7th-12th grade as the area of focus and we approach ministry to that group with a broad net that will connect with all of those students in some way. Some may be too deep for the 7th graders, and some may be too elementary for the 12th graders, but either way, those students will catch something that is relevant to their lives. But I realize that I should look at each of these smaller groups as a community within our group and find strategic ways to build relationships among those kids.

What obstacles have you come across in multi-school ministry? What things have you done to help overcome these obstacles?

Maintaining Momentum in Youth Ministry

Momentum is defined as force or speed of movement; impetus, as of a physical object or course of events. While this concept of physics is impossible to dismiss, many people in the sports world will say that momentum in an athletic contest is a farce. They will tell you that somehow it's impossible for a critical play to add to or take away from a team's drive so much that it effects the outcome of a game. However, if you watched the Super Bowl last Sunday, I think you saw the law of momentum directly played out in front of the world's largest TV audience. So if you'll humor me, please forgive me for yet another sports metaphor. As a sports fan, it's just ingrained in me.

The Saints had 1st and goal inside the Colts' 5-yard line not long before the first half ended. The Colts made a huge defensive stand and prevented the Saints from scoring--a seemingly huge blow for the Saints. The Saints however were able to make a great defensive stand on their next possession, force a punt, then kick a field goal just before halftime cutting their deficit to 10-6. But what happened after halftime was where the law of momentum came into play. With the Saints kicking off in the second half, they made a very aggressive play call-an onside kick that NO ONE saw coming. This kick was successful and gave them the momentum to drive down and score, giving them their first lead of the game. The rest, we know, is history.

So does momentum exist outside of the laws of physical science? I think it does in sports, in life, and in organizations. In ministry as in any other arena, momentum is much easier to keep going than to create. If you were to start a large rock rolling down a hill, the hardest part would be getting the rock loose from it's starting position-once it's rolling it's easier to keep it rolling. So what things help us create momentum in ministry?

1. Consistency--just like pushing on that rock helps get it started, and continuing to push on that rock will keep it going, consistency is critical. This means we have to be methodical with meetings times, communication, and interaction. All areas of our ministry programs must have consistency. Students need a sense of comfort and a sense of knowing what to expect.

2. Focus--just as force must be applied in the right places to get the rock rolling and to keep it rolling, focus must be given to the right areas of ministry to build and maintain momentum. Those of us in youth ministry know what it's like to experience the ebb and flow of being the "cool youth group" in town where everyone comes for a while, then something happens and everyone is running off to another church. But focus constantly on the kids who are there and eventually kids will come back around. Don't let your kids get discouraged by saying things like, "Where is everyone?" Stay positive and build up the faithful few.

3. Change--the thing that kept the ball rolling for the Saints was the totally unexpected onside kick to start the second half. Thinking outside the box helps build momentum. While consistency is critical to building it, change is just as critical to keeping it going. Doing the exact same thing over and over will create stagnation. Mix things up and don't just do things because "it worked last year."

What would you add to this list? What do you do to build momentum in your ministry?

Getting Adult Involvement in Youth Ministry--Baby Steps

Many churches have the mentality that hiring a youth director/pastor/worker will solve all of their youth-related issues and they can "wipe their hands clean" of all things youth. But those in the trenches of youth ministry know that no youth program will ever be effective if it is the youth worker's one-person show. Lots of youth workers ask the question, "How do you get parents and volunteers involved?" I was just asked this same question by a fellow youth worker who was fairly new to her congregation and was facing a sense of apathy from many parents of youth. So, I laid out for her how we've made the progression from getting them to bring their kids to getting them involved and recorded my thoughts here. This is not the only way or even the best way...just the way that has worked for us.

1. Rely on them for planning. Almost every youth program has events throughout the year. The last thing a youth worker wants to do is plan a retreat while half the youth group is going to be at a band contest, or plan a mission trip when a large number of kids will be at cheerleading camp. Parents are an invaluable resource for simply synchronizing the calendar so that youth events are at a time that are most convenient for everyone.

2. Get their help with mundane, but necessary tasks in the youth program. Just about every church has a minimum requirement on the number of adults that should be at every youth meeting, event or trip. Also, many churches have limited transportation (only one church van, or maybe two vans and only one driver). Recruit parents to be "warm bodies" at meetings and drivers and chaperones on trips. This just gets them used to being a part of the program.

3. Move into more spiritual roles. Many youth groups are set up in a small group ministry model where kids spend time developing relationships and learning in small groups with kids their own age and gender. The next step for many volunteers will be to spend time as a small group leader. While some ministries require a lot of planning and preparation, our small group ministry will be for a short question time at the end of our Sunday night Bible study. It is my hope and goal that these small groups will begin to do some activities on their own outside of the regular youth group meetings.

What has worked for you in your ministry?

Youth Ministry: Preparing the Child for the Path

I posted yesterday about my own spiritual journey and the role that hard times have played in my understanding of God and how he relates to us and also how he wants us to respond to him. Today I read an email account of someone who was at a Regent's banquet at a high school in Texas.

The guest speaker for this banquet was Brad McCoy, who is well-known as a football coach, but even more well-known for being the father of Colt McCoy, who has been the face of Texas Longhorn football for the last four years. Being from Texas, the celebrity status of the nearly-national championship team hits close to home. In fact, I know a couple of the players on that UT football team who happen to be from my home town of Palestine, TX...but I digress.

According to the email, Mr. McCoy shared his story about the recent events surrounding the National Championship football game in which Colt was injured on the third play. He shared how God worked through this seemingly dire situation for a young man who had played over 40 consecutive games only to get hurt at the very beginning of the most important game of his life. One comment that was quoted from Brad McCoy was the philosophy that he and his wife share in raising their children, "You prepare your child for the path, rather than prepare the path for the child."

As I thought about my approach to youth ministry, these words resounded with me. I think many times youth workers do try to prepare the path for the child--and I used to be one of them. We are so busy building a hedge around our kids to shield them from the perils of the real world that our kids learn to live in a purely Christian bubble. We take them to Christian concerts and Christian youth days at our favorite theme parks. We show all the latest Christian movies by Christian production companies and teach lessons based on the movies. We give them Christian T-shirts and bracelets with witty acronyms and slogans on them so they won't stray from their faith. We encourage them so much to avoid certain activities that inadvertently they avoid anyone who does those activities. I'm afraid, many times, these kids will learn to function within the confines of a church, but not in the real world, because the real world is nothing like this Christian bio-dome we've created. These students will not know how to be relationally evangelistic because they will not have any friends who are not Christians. Now some people go too far the other way and really just teach that Christianity is just a supplement to a number of other important things in their lives. I don't agree with that either. I'm not saying Christian movies or T-shirts or events are bad--many of these things are good. But they shouldn't be our source of identity as Christians or four our teens in our youth groups. So how do we prepare students for the path of life, rather than preparing the path for them? How do we find that balance in what we teach without creating a Eutopia of shallow kids with a huge stash of Christian T-shirts, bumper stickers, and bracelets with abbreviations on them? Here are some things I think we can do.

1. Don't be afraid of the world in which our kids live. Let me make a distinction here. I think there is a difference between addressing the world the kids live in and embracing it. Truth is absolute. And I believe all truth comes from God. But I think truth can come in many forms and does not necessarily have to come from a “Christian” source. Rob Bell said in Velvet Elvis that the word "Christian" is a great noun, but a horrible adjective. I happen to agree. When the label "Christian" becomes the primary component of our filtration process, we can miss a lot. Jesus is the ultimate revelation of truth. But, if there are things students can learn from movies, music, books that aren't "Christian", we should be open to embracing the truth found in those things, even though they don't have the adjective "Christian" somewhere in their description. Something doesn't have to be labeled "Christian" to be true, but somehow we try to teach our students that truth can’t exist in anything that doesn’t come from a “Christian” source. So when they see a Scientologist or a Muslim teaching about loving one another or some other tenet they share with Christianity, it creates a crisis of belief for the student. An example of this occurred a few of years ago when mainstream Latin rock band Los Lonely Boys released the song "How Far Is Heaven,"-a prayer asking God to deliver the writer from the trials of life. The song quickly became a smash hit on pop radio. Not long after the song's release, the song was covered almost note-for-note by Christian Latin rock band Salvador and the song became a huge hit on Christian radio, even though many listeners now feel the original version is superior. Why did the song have to be “Christianized” before certain radio stations could or would play it? God's truth doesn't have to come in a box with the word "Christian" stamped across the top. By allowing students to see truth in their world, they are less likely to have this philosophical meltdown when they realize that someone who isn't a Christian can have similar views to their own. But they will also be able to know that their beliefs are founded on who God is and how he was revealed in Jesus Christ. Likewise, they will be less likely to abandon their faith in Christ for some merely humanitarian ideology that isn't centered on the person of Christ because it looks similar to Christianity.

2. Teach them to serve others without regard for a person's religious views. I've served a number of churches over the years. It seems many of these churches were great at taking care of their own members, but not very good at meeting the needs of those outside the church. Their own members who were elderly, sick, or poor, were nonetheless saints of God who lived out their faith daily. These are important people and most certainly should be helped. But when we serve someone and do not question where they attend church or whether or not they have put their faith in Christ, students learn from it. I'm not saying we shouldn't be evangelistic. I'm saying our agenda should be showing love to someone rather than making a convert. If God opens the door for them to put their faith in Christ, great, but love should be our motive, not a notch on our Bible or another church member. Another possible outcome is students may wind up serving someone who isn't overly appreciative or friendly, which creates a different internal reaction to the time spent serving. Learning that everyone we serve in love is excited and appreciative of what we do creates an unrealistic expectation of how real people in the "real world" will respond to loving assistance from followers of Christ. After Katrina we had a chance to do a mission trip in New Orleans. We worked five days on two different houses and never met the homeowners the whole time we were there. No thank you notes. No appreciative phone calls. Nothing. My students came back with a different sense of what it meant to serve someone who, at least in the students' eyes, didn't appear to be thankful.

3. Give them opportunities to spend time with local Christian students from other denominations. One thing the youth pastors and leaders in our area have a passion for is building unity among the teenage members of the body of Christ across denominational lines. So we plan three to four events a year that allow students from all denominations to meet together in worship and prayer. This shows the students of our area that these other students are on their team. They may go to different churches. They may do some different things in their worship. But they are on the same team! I believe doctrine is important to every denomination. Students should know what their church believes and what they personally believe. However, something is wrong when we get so ingrained with denominational doctrine that we spend our time arguing with other Christians about things like the methodology of baptism or predestination vs. freewill instead of joining our brothers and sisters under the banner of Christ to impact our communities for the glory of God. Reading Jesus' conversations with the Pharisees we can see what Christ thought of legalism. Yet, we get so dogmatic sometimes about the aspects of our faith that are less important that we forget to focus on the things that are most important. If our students refuse to fellowship with other students because they don't baptize like we do, or they have a female pastor, or they speak in tongues at their church, we have done something terribly wrong. Paul encourages us to look past our differences in Ephesians 4:4-6. There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope when you were called— one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

We live in such a godless society, it is easy to get caught in the trap of trying to create the perfect Christian kingdom for our students. But when our goal is to prepare them for life after youth group, or after high school, our focus is not on creating a perfect environment, but rather on creating a student with an arsenal of tools to deal with a cold, harsh world that has lost its sense of who God is. What things do you do in your ministry to "prepare the child for the path"?

The Most Important Factor in Getting Kids to Church

I've been doing this thing called youth ministry now for a long time...and wouldn't you know, I'm still trying to figure it all out. I've read books, been to conferences, sat in formal classes, discussed with my peers, joined discussion forums, and just about everything else I can do to understand these slightly-smaller-than-me people God made called teenagers. While everyone will say that numbers don't matter, there still seems to be this unwritten pressure to get more kids in the door. Youth leaders like me are always discussing the perfect event, the perfect activity, the perfect format for our meetings (you know, hang out, then structured games, then worship, then Bible study), the perfect outreach event or trip, and how important small groups are to our ministries. And these are all good. But I think I've figured out the #1 factor in whether or not a student attends a particular church or youth group. That factor is....friends.

Yes, friends. Why do some kids want to go to a different church than where their parents go? Friends. Why do some of the kids who come to your youth group have no family members in your church? Friends. Why do some kids whose parents are very involved in your church choose not to come to youth group meetings? Friends. How could friends cause them not to come? Because their friends are not at youth group. The people they consider to be friends are in 7th period algebra or on the basketball team with them. They are playing video games with them on Friday nights before crashing out on the living room floor with a half-eaten bowl of popcorn.

So, what do we do when a kid in your church doesn't consider the other kids in the youth group to be "friends"? This is a common thing in my group as we have 5 school districts and nearly 10 campuses in the area around my church. I also changed churches my 7th grade year because I was the only kid in my youth group who went to a particular school and felt I had absolutely nothing in common with the other students there (which was true). I went to a smaller church with a smaller youth program because of one thing. Friends. So here are some things to help kids connect and make their "friends from church" just their "friends".

1. Schedule games and activities that encourage the kids to interact with each other. Play silly games that encourage interaction and team building.

2. Allow for informal relationship building with time for kids to hang out. Video games are a great way for kids to connect with each other.

3. Encourage kids to spend time together outside of youth group.

4. On short trips, discourage your kids from bringing video games or MP3 players to encourage interaction with one another. (On long trips your kids may go crazy without these things and will probably eventually bond anyway.)

To be honest, though, I wrote this post not because of my expertise, but because of my frustration. It seems the main reason I have some kids who are not as active is because they don't consider the kids at church to be their friends. Some of them attend other churches. Some don't come at all. Some of my kids who do come are very active because of the friendships they have there. What is it that you do in your youth group (or out of it) to allow kids who go to different schools or run in different social circles to build relationships and become friends?

Why I'll be Showing a Blatantly Non-Christian Movie at Youth Group

Some time earlier this year (I think around October), my wife and I had some rare, kidless downtime and found ourselves in Tyler (the nearest town with several decent-sized movie theatres) with a few hours to kill and a few extra bucks in our pockets. Being that we were an hour's drive from home and had just showed up at the theatre hoping to catch something good, we realized we didn't want to wait 45 minutes to see the new Sandra Bullock film. So we opted to see "The Invention of Lying" which started in just a few minutes. We had heard no reviews about the movie, but with a cast that included Jennifer Garner, Tina Fey, and appearances by Rob Lowe and Phillip Seymour Hoffman, it looked promising to say the least. Two hours later, I found my heart and mind in a tug-of-war wrestling with a number of ideas that had been presented in a very different way. Because of the response it created in me, I immediately realized I had to show it to my youth group and allow them to be presented with the same questions that were presented to me during the film.

I did not include a link to a movie review of this movie because the opinions surrounding this movie are as varied as the number of people who've written them. I didn't want you to read a Christian's conservative review blasting the film as "blasphemous" nor did I want an extremely open-minded review praising its satire, which many people found just plain offensive. If you have not seen the film, I would urge you to resist temptation and see it without reading anything about it beforehand. I will say that the film was co-written, co-directed, and starred in by professed atheist and British comedian Ricky Gervais, famous for his role in original British version of the hit comedy series, The Office (the pre-cursor to the wildly popular American version). Without giving away too much information on the movie (you can google all the movie reviews you like), I can say that "The Invention of Lying", whether by intent or not, makes a case for atheism much the same way "Facing the Giants" or "Fireproof" makes a case for putting faith in God. In the course of the story, this movie takes numerous less-than-subtle stabs at Christianity, Jewish traditions, and the whole idea of faith in general. It is rated PG-13 for language, some sexual material, and one drug reference. So why will I be showing it to my youth group after it is released on DVD January 19th? Here is why.

1. I think we learn more about ourselves and what we believe from people who disagree with us, than simply by listening to people who are echoing our own thoughts. As I left the theatre after seeing this movie--while my blood was boiling because many parts of me felt like my faith, which I hold ver dear, was under attack--I began to process the argument that had been presented to me through this subversive, yet light-hearted medium. For me, it wasn't something that caused me to question my faith, but rather solidify it.

2. We must be challenged in order to grow. The metaphor of a muscle in the human body being broken down in order to be rebuilt in a bigger, stronger way has become cliche, but it holds true. If you have ever been through a physically strenuous workout, whether running, or lifting weights, or some other form of exercise, or if you've exerted yourself physically more than usual, the next day, you will find you will be quite sore--sometimes in places you didn't realize you had! That is because using our muscles excessively causes them to break down, then rebuild themselves in a stronger manner. Likewise, many houseplants (from the way I understand it) will not really start to grow, until their roots have found their way to the sides of the pot. So challenging my students will cause them to ask some really important questions and in the proper environment we will be able to answer their questions.

3. Creating a bubble for our Christian kids does not paint a clear picture of reality. I've known many people in youth ministry (and I have been there myself) who feel it is our job as youth leaders to shield our precious children from all the reprehensible stuff out there in the world. We encourage them to only listen to Christian music (especially on youth trips) and only watch "G" or "PG" rated films. And while this can work in the vacuum of youth group meetings or even a week-long camp, it's not realistic to assume that our students follow these same ideals when they are not at youth group functions. Now, does that mean I show the latest Quentin Tarantino movie at our next movie night? Absolutely not. However, our job as youth workers is not to shield them from the world, but rather to give them the means to adapt to the culture they are in and to do that from a faith-based standpoint.

We've all heard the stories about the student who goes off to college and find his faith challenged by some philosophy professor who thinks Christianity is all a bunch of garbage, or the other college student who is too busy partying to remain true to his Christian beliefs that may or may not have ever truly been his own (as opposed to his parents). I feel that if youth workers are to be effective, we have to get our heads out of the sand and be aware of the culture our kids live in and give them the tools to help solidify their faith.

Do you agree with this approach? Would you show this movie to your kids? What similar things have you done in your ministry to challenge the way kids think?

Youth Bands: Taking Summer Off

I've always had a fear of cancelling certain activities and events for extended periods of time out of fear that when it came time to start them up again that we would be building from the ground up. This came especially true when it came to working with youth bands. Since building a worship band required more time and energy than other youth activities, I felt that it was a more delicate program and if cancelled would run the risk of never starting back.

But this summer, we did some things differently in our youth program. Since many kids go out of town during the summer, we scaled down our Bible study times to more of a hanging out/small group format. We didn't use Power Point or very many video clips, and we met in one of the smaller rooms of the youth building rather than the big room where we normally met. And, reluctantly, we cancelled youth band at the end of last school year, and didn't pick it up until the schools had started back up at the end of August. Last weekend we had our first practice in over two months. I found that students who had fallen away from the band came back and some who had interest before now were excited about joining. I also found that our players had been practicing over the summer because they were not having regular rehearsals...so practicing was a sort of boredom buster for them. This also created less stress on families because they didn't have to worry about working band rehearsals into their summer schedule. My friend Russell Martin reminded me that everything has a season and I think that is certainly true with youth-led worship bands.

Mary, Martha, Baseball, and Me

I haven't written a blog post in several days for a few different reasons. Namely, that I've been gone to another camp (my third camp of the summer), and am currently involved with our church's Vacation Bible School. Next week, I will be heading off to my last camp of the summer. Being called into youth ministry, busy summers seem to be just part of the deal that "comes with the territory". I mean for 91/2 months of the year we "compete" with school, band, sports, scouts, one act play, UIL academics, and all other things that are connected to a life in public education. So summer is a time when kids theoretically have more time to devote to other things--such as church and spiritual development.

I've been doing some reading, though, and have realized that summer, although free of school, is still summer and is a time to be relaxed, laid back, and should be a time to refresh? So why do I feel like a Martha running around like a headless chicken trying to teach kids how to be like Mary? In our youth group, we have scaled down our Bible study times on the week's we've met and haven't met at all when we were gone to church camp or one of our missions camps. So how can I stay refreshed in the midst of being gone so much and being so busy week after week? Well, here's what I've found that seems to work.

My wife and I love Texas Rangers baseball. This has been a really good season for the team that has never made it past the first round of the playoffs. At one point they were in first place in their division, and 5 games ahead of the LA Angels. June wasn't a good month, though, and it's taking them a while to hit their stride again. The biggest issue for the Rangers seems to be getting hits with runners in scoring position. At one time this season they hit 14 solo home runs in a row. In order to win games, they have to get their hits with runners on bases. After all, the game is won on runs, not hits. This means that baseball is a game of timing.

For me, this summer, I've tried really hard to embrace the time I have at home with family. I also have tried to spend less time at the office when I'm not away at camp. We took a great vacation this summer and it has helped me stay connected to my family and to God. Capitalizing on opportunities is what has kept me going. If we are in the service of the King, I think there are times where we will inevitably be like Martha and that's not necessarily bad. What we have to do, though, is make sure we have time to spend on the things that matter most and that we make the most of those opportunities.

Spiritual Windmills

Last year, my dad--who is a rancher--acquired a new plot of land to pasture his cattle. This place had a couple of barns, a small corral, and a stock pond (we call them "tanks" in east Texas). One of the items out at this place was a small decorative windmill that stood about 7 feet tall. It had a yaupon holly bush growing up through the middle of it and was not serving any sort of purpose whatsoever. For the longest time I thought, "Wow, that would be kind of cool in my yard." So, I asked my dad about it and he said I was welcome to have it.

Well, a few weeks ago, I was over at the pasture doing something and while I was there, I picked the windmill up, put it in my pickup, then brought it to my house. It sits in my front yard. I've heard that these small windmills are a deterrent for gophers because they don't like the vibrations they send through the ground. I cannot attest to the success or failure of the windmill as a gopher repellent. What has amazed me, though, is how much I enjoy watching the stupid thing. Yes, I get up in the morning, go to the kitchen window, and look at the windmill to see how hard the wind is blowing and which direction it is blowing from. It's a wonderful surprise in these summer months to see the windmill pointing toward the north and spinning at a brisk rotation!

Well, a few days ago, I was admiring the windmill and I was thinking about a verse of scripture. In the second chapter of Acts, the Holy Spirit is described as "a mighty, rushing wind". In the passage, it appears to be a literal wind as the spirit comes down and inhabits the believers at Pentecost. In John 3, Jesus is having his famous night-time conversation with Nicodemus and he says, "The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit." One of my favorite quotes from Billy Graham is that God is like the wind. We cannot see the wind. We can see the effects of the wind, but cannot see the wind itself.

Several years ago, I went through the study "Experiencing God" by Henry Blackaby. One of the teachings in the study is that we should find what God is doing through the Holy Spirit and join him there. I think every Christian would probably rather work alongside the Holy Spirit than work alone. But the working is not the hardest part. For most of us, it is finding where the Hoy Spirit is at work. What if we had a spiritual windmill to tell us what direction the "wind" was blowing and how powerful it was? Or do we have some of these spiritual windmills already? What are the indicators that God is at work? I think we often assume rapid growth of a church is a sign of God's movement. So what things serve as indicators of what God is doing?